Jiwan Funde

What I learned when I lost…

Getting straight to the point…

Recently I lost my laptop data. ALL of it. It included my daily writing work, photos, videos, songs, movies and what not. For the last 1 year my laptop has become everything for me. I had a really bad habit of treasuring memories in the form of writeups backed with photos and videos.

I used to write on my laptop. Whatever is on my mind it’s on my laptop. There would be about 4 word files that are WIP at any particular time.

Photos and videos of my 17 months daughter. I had treasured 1000s (yes!!) of her photos and videos since the day she was born. Me and my husband’s photos of last 30 years. Photos of our four years of married life. I was crazy about photos and collecting them. I lost all of these.

A rare and unique collection of over 8000+ songs, which I was so proud of. Name a song and I had it. All gone.

Movies collection of both Hollywood and. Bollywood. All gone.

So all ranting is done. This is about what’s all gone, what’s all lost. Now let me tell you what I found.

Initially, I was so agitated that it even drew a few droplets out of my eyes. I was depressed as if I have lost everything. (Yes I did)

Then I peeped within. I observed my inner feelings. Oh !! what attachment, what adhesion I had with all such stuff. I saw and observed and realized. Gradually, all the negative feelings of depression, irritation, anger, helplessness, pain, agony, pangs of conscience, agitation all began to disperse and eventually disappeared.

1. How we get attached to things and people, and when they go away from our life it hurts. And it hurts a lot. 30 years of both the parents and 2 years of the kid. All gone. No memories will be there for this time period. Oh really?? Not physically, but only in our minds. These are only photos that are gone. Even living people go and we have to accept it. (Being blunt, but it is the bitter truth) I am another step closer to detachment. And life gave me a chance to get rid of my “extras”.

2. Doubt and fear are imaginary and they feed on our imagination. The more you imagine the more they will grow. And these two never live in present. Both doubt and fear arise when we either think of past or the future. “What will I say to my kid when she asks for her childhood photos??” “Oh how good the photos and everything were?? ” Stop thinking about past or the future. Live in present and avoid doubt and fear.

3. Whatever happens, happens for the good. So what’s good in this?? See the positive in every situation. I no longer have to worry about these things when I die. My Burden is decreased. It unburdened me by the pressure of regularly taking and collecting all my data at one place (yes, I used to do that). Now, I have one job less to do.

4. It is ok to not be perfect. I was a perfectionist (in certain ways) and I want things in a proper systematic way. Be it the gadgets, data, home decor, or any darn thing. I let go of that ‘perfectionist’ feeling. I am ok with the things and situations as they are.

5. If it is written, it is bound to happen. Sometime or later. It is fixed and nothing can change it. So better to not become an obstacle and keep the flow smooth. Accept not expect and go with the flow.

P.S. – It took me 2.5 hours and ‘a flash second ‘ to accept the loss and make peace with the situation.

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings, Vipassana | 3 Comments


पहली बार हिंदी में पोस्ट लिख रही हूँ | कविताएँ जरूर लिखीं है । मुझे हमेशा हिचक बनी रहती है |हिंदी हमारी मातृभाषा है , किसी से कमतर नहीं पर न जाने क्यों, हिंदी में लिखने का विचार हमेशा मुझे सताता है |  काफ़ी समय से यह पोस्ट ड्राफ्ट्स में रखा हुआ था | मन में विचार आ आ कर रुकते थे की इसे पब्लिश करूँ या नहीं | चूँकि इसमें कुछ खास है नहीं, सिर्फ चंद पंक्तियाँ ही है, परन्तु पता नहीं क्यों दिल को छूती है | आज फाइनली इसे पब्लिश कर रही हु | इसे मैंने नहीं लिखा | कभी बहुत पहले कही पढ़ा या सुना था तो लिख कर रख लिया था | यह आदत है मेरी | कुछ अच्छा सुना या दिल को छूने वाला लेख पढ़ा, या फिर किसी से बात करते वक़्त ही अनायास कुछ अच्छा लगा, तो लिख लेती हूँ |

मैं हमेशा मानती हूँ, कि यह ज़िन्दगी हमें हर वक़्त, हर लम्हा, हर घड़ी कुछ न कुछ सिखाती ही रहती है | इन पंक्तियाँ में भी ऐसा ही कुछ है | जब कभी पढ़ो तो बल प्रदान करती है |

स्मृतियों में हमारे पास हमारी बहुत सी मुस्कानें सुरक्षित होती है | ढेर से दुखों , सुखों और उन पुराने दुखों से उबरने के सुखों की सुखद और भली स्मृतियाँ भी अपनी जगह बना कर स्मृतियों में कही सुरक्षित बनी रहती हैं | और गाहे बगाहे जब हम किसी नए दुःख से टकराते है तो हम स्मृतियों में सुरक्षित उन्ही सुखद और भले दिनों की स्मृतियों की शरणगाह अपनाते है | यहीं से हमें फिर उबरने , फिर लौटने और फिर खड़े होने का सहस भी मिलता है |


Linking this post with #Monday Musings


Categories: Gyan, Hindi | Tags: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Simple Truth !!

After so much hurt and resultant thinking the great great ‘Anami’ found out the basic reason for ‘expectations‘.

We expect the same thing from someone which we would do if we were in their situation, wearing their shoes.

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , , , | 1 Comment

Words….are not enough

You convey words when you say anything. You can’t convey the intention they are said with. So hard to communicate in this complicated world. It is the doubt that create all this non-sense. Lack of trust is the root cause. Trust the person as your own and you will never see the negative words but only positive intentions.

The same set of word from our loved ones will never hurt us, but it will hurt, when it comes from someone else’s loved one.

Where is the difference after-all..

1. Set of words are same.

2. Persons they are coming from holds same position.

3. The intentions / mind sets are same.

4. Person receiving those words is same.

Then where is the controversy?? Where is the misunderstanding created ?? It is us who create the difference. No one out there is forcing us to take both situations otherwise. It is us. Difference is in our mind. Difference is in our mental image of both the persons. Any solution ?? Yes, why not. Every problem has a solution. The solution here is you..your mental attitude..which need to be expanded from the traditional world conditioning.

Receptive Error. Yes, it is the term for this situation. Listener’s misunderstanding of the speaker’s intentions.


Now from speaker’s point of view. You say something so normal, but it was taken wrong. Totally misunderstood. This is so confusing, irritating for some people like me, who have somewhat week connection between their thoughts and tongue. To express their thoughts, rather just to say or ask something they have to create a nice sentence in their minds, think about others reaction and, then speak up. And that thinking process sometimes take more than expected time and ruin the situation. sigh..

And now one may ask, what they think upon for so long. That could not be the fact. But it is cent percent true. It is that, they think more about others than self. Which I agree should be considered as sin. Yes, why not. Nowadays how many people out there think ‘what he/she will think if I say so?’ or ‘what if he /she will feel bad by my this action?’ I guess none. This is right in a way. Why the hell do we care and think about anyone else. We should say and do whatever we want to do without thinking of others. (sarcastic?? Huh.. )

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , | 4 Comments

Keep Learning

I always say – everything and everyone out there, teach us something. It depends on us, how and what we learn. Was lost from some days and forgot my own words. (Well am glad, me back on track now :)) Today i learned from candy crush. Yes the same addictive candy crush game some people love and some people hate 😉

I suppose one can find a large amount of meaning in the smallest of everyday tasks, if only able to take a moment and appreciate the beauty within the littlest pieces of our lives 🙂

Have a look at this –
Candy Crush

First reaction – Damn!! how the hell can anyone complete the order in this.
On the second thought – “Anyways, let’s start, let me see, at least start, will see then.” yoo !!, its a three star win.

Now, what i learned from candy crush, it may seem impossible with just one move, at the very first sight, but eventually you will win with three stars. Yeah it’s so true !! It is so practical about life as well, isn’t it ??

One step is enough to start..just go on and create more moves..

P.S – This was a long pending post from January 😛 On teacher’s day recalled this.

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , | 4 Comments

Self talk

Remembered a line from one of my blog post Addiction Redefined ‘We have to accept that love doesn’t give us the license to own a person’

Yes.. so License to own (kaash hota). Then who am I to change him. why I want him to change for me.. just for me.. I want this only because I love him. Am I becoming selfish.. yes you can say that.I am selfish.


Let’s analyse. I love him. I EXPECT him to change in few things. Expectations hurt, so they did, am no different. But isn’t this also true that loving someone will automatically give rise to expectations ?? You expect from your loved ones only, not from a you ??

‘Love but don’t expect’..hmm another learning ..but is that so easy.. I doubt.. I toh can’t do this.

Ohh Yeaass..’unconditional love’..I will love without any condition.  but does that mean I would let him do ‘not good’ things ??

I love-I expect-Expectation hurts-I love with no expectation-I can’t see  his bad-I love again-I expect again. Such a vicious circle..where is the end of this ??

P.S. Take this as my way of expression. No negatives please.

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It’s YOUR OWN life !! Live Good.

In one of my earlier posts Addiction Redefined i mentioned about 90 / 10 Principle. Seriously, it slipped off my mind until a friend requested it and me too came across situations which remind me of this.  So here it goes..90/10 Principle by Stephen Covey

It will change your life
(or at least, the way you react to situations)

We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be arriving late, which throws our whole schedule off.
A driver may cut us off in the traffic.

You CAN control 90% of your life – by how you react to the 10% you can’t control. You yourself can influence your attitudes, behaviors, thoughts, and words.


We are into the habit of reacting almost immediately to what was happening around without any attempt to control our reactions in any way. Because of that, our reactions were negative and destructive.


 Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 Principle.

If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You do not have to let the negative comments affect you. React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, or getting stressed out.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in the traffic?
Do you lose your temper?
Pound on the steering wheel?
Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket?
Who cares if you arrive 10 seconds later at work?
Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 Principle and don’t worry about it.

You are told you lost your job.
Why lose sleep and get irritated?
It will not work out.
Use your worrying energy and time to find a new job.

The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day.
Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant?
She has no control over what is going on.
It will just make things worse.
Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger, why stress out?

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed, Gyan | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

2014 Review – Not Thaaat Bad !!

Overall..Better than nothing.

The prepared a 2014 annual report for my blog.

Yeah posts were few but will improve in 2015, for sure. 🙂

Click here to see the complete report.

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The Only Aid




lockFalling, disappointment, sadness, feeling down, blahblabla….. all negatives are also the part of life.

My happiness is in my hands. No one but i am the maker of my mood, my day, my life. Why and how the hell anyone out there can hit me inside?? No one can. No one has that right.

RISE every time i fall, i IGNORE & KICK OUT disappointments, i CHEER UP in sadness, i SMILE every time i am down. i Say – “Yes !! i can change my mood, and i WILL.”  CRY??.. yes i cry hard but then i SMILE HARDER. yohooo… i am happy, i made myself happy and i promise to be back again from lows, in lesser efforts..

The key to my mood, my feelings is in my hands, i know better which way to unlock. 😉



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I Trust YOU !!


Let no negative thoughts come in. Emit only and only positive energy.

Gradually you will begin to feel the power of trusting.

Don’t be afraid. Overcome your fear.

Trust till the end. If you don’t trust it is the end anyway.


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Losing All Hope is Freedom.

Never Lose Hope.


Read somewhere – “Never lose hope”. Also read “losing all hope is freedom”. How contradictory !! This is the same controversial thing I have posted some time back. Another adds up to the list 😉

Namiwise –

  1. “Losing All Hope is Freedom”, then why is it said that – “Never Lose Hope” ??
  2. Why  “Never Lose Hope” if  “Losing All Hope is Freedom” ??

HOPE – very vague term. Can be used, twisted & turned person to person. So much subjective in nature. It is our state of mind that matters. Hope binds us (hope is bandhan). In general hope means desire. And desire gives rise to bondages. If I want to be free, there should not be any hope. If we want to be free from bondages, we have to obviously lose hope (bondages). When there is hope without any desire than it may be called “faith”. Faith should again be desireless. There should not be any craving no aversion. This is the bottom line. Whether I hope, not hope, desire, not desire, have faith or don’t have faith , in every situation my very state of mind should be equanimous. Then it will work.

Never lose hope is sort of craving and when it becomes intense you will never get what you are not losing hope for. And at that very stage, the last stage, your mind will get desire free and you lose all and feel free. AND ..AND…YES THEN..WHOOSSHH… here it appears what you no more hope for. THIS IS THE REAL LAW OF NATURE.

Never lose hope and keep doing efforts but never let it overtake your state of mind of calmness and at the end of the day when you lose all hope you will be FREE. FREE like you were born anew, free as you were on the first day.. with no hope, no desire, no faith ..nothing. just calm and equanimous.

“Never Lose Hope” will keep me going. Will keep me alive. that is necessary for living and “Losing All Hope” is actual and real freedom and is very necessary for DYING. Will help me die.




That means hope binds us, hope is bandhan. If I want to be free then there should not be any hope but faith. Yes faith is better than hope. Hope is asakti bhara.. hope is desire.. but faith is vishwas, vishwas is always greater than desire.

Faith is desireless. If there is desire then it comes craving, when craving comes then the thought does not remain pure, but it gets spoiled by the ego, by desire.

Faith sets us free from desire, from hope. Hope is craving, faith is bhakti.

If I hope I cannot be free, if I want to be free I have to lose all hope.

Set myself free from hope. No hopes means no desire, no desire means no craving, means no tension means free.

Faith is trust, devotion. Hope is expectation, and expectation hurts..always.

Lose hope but gain faith.

Strong faith can beat all hopes.

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Simple & Straight

Put the past behind you and move on. Keep running.

Sometimes it will stop raining, sun will come up.

I couldn’t say when.

just keep running

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed, Gyan, One Liners | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

खास अहसास

Translate in English

       किसी अपने की सलाह थी – खुश होना सिखा है बेटा, तो दुख को भी समझना | इसके बड़े
गहरे मायने थे |

Khas Ahsas

उन लोगों को देखकर हैरानी होती है, जो दर्द को दबाने की कोशिश करते है | किसी भी तकलीफ से निपटने का तरीका, उसे दबाने से हासिल नहीं होता | उसका सामना करने से मिलता है | ज़ख्म अँधेरे में रोशन होते है | दर्द तभी चमकता है | उसकी लौ का अहसास रखना उसकी कद्र करना है |

कोई दिल दुखाए, तो महसूस करना | दर्द को शिद्दत से नापना | कोई अपमानित करे, तो उसके प्रति लापरवाही न बरतना | अपमान को महसूस करना | सारे अहसास तरतीब से जमे रहेंगे, तो उसूल बनाने का कोई कारण रहेगा | उसूलों को वही समझ सकता है, जो सारे अहसासात की कद्र करता हो |

कंधे झटक कर, गर किसी अहसास से किनारा किया, तो तजुर्बे की एक राह छुट जाएगी | ज़िन्दगी की बदसूरतियों को बेनकाब देखने की मंशा किसी की नहीं होती, लेकिन इनसे कभी न कभी सामना होगा, इनसे इंकार भी कैसे किया जा सकता है | हमेशा काफिले साथ नहीं होते, कहीं तन्हा भी चलना पड़ता है | तकलीफ के ज्वार से, अपने उसूलों को थामकर निकले, तो जीत का वो अहसास होगा, जिसका ईनाम मज़बूत शख्सियत के तौर पर मिलेगा |

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed, Gyan | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Happy Birthday


happy birthday

Birthdays are good for health. Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays live
longer . .  😉
Happy Happy Birthday to me …. 😀
Hey God ji keep blessing me and keep supporting…all the way 🙂
Guide me, clearly understand and achieve all I want in life..
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LIVE The Life.. Its Good..

In 1923, eight of the wealthiest people in the world met. Their combined wealth, it is estimated, exceeded the wealth of the government of the United States at that time. These men certainly knew how to make a living and accumulate wealth.

But let’s examine what happened to them 25 years later.  Continue reading

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