Posts Tagged With: choice

Focus


Came across this on some FB group. It ignited a war of words within me. It’s always been a topic of debate.

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Yes I am from that generation. (Most of us are.) I was one of those kids. I had seen my mother sacrificing everything only to make us happy. Somewhere deep down I also had that feeling that sacrifice is the only way to live.

This type of conditioning need to be changed. Of course, parents are not doing this intentionally. They are not telling or teaching their children to sacrifice for other’s happiness. They are just doing what they have learnt by watching their parents. And their children see them and learn. Children learn what they see.

As the time passes and kids grow up, it becomes a habit. Sacrificing and compromising is now a part of  the behavior. As a kid and still in teenage, they continue to think of others (definitely our loved ones) before “own self”. This mindset, if not changed and, if freezes deep down in roots of mind, will do no good but bad. So,this wiring need a repair-maintenance in today’s world.

Time has changed and so should we.

I am not saying that don’t think about others at all. It is like “don’t think of others at the cost of your own self”. As I grow up I realized that it is more important to make “yourself” happy before others. Whenever making others happy calls for a sacrifice or a compromise, never take that call. If ever you do or if you have to then don’t call it a relation. It was just a give-take business.

NOW I am shifting focus of my camera to “myself” from others.

Now, I am not going to sacrifice any damn thing for anyone out there. Yes you heard me right.. I won’t. Till now I had done what I did. Now I will live my own life.. making ME happy first.. then others.

Ask yourself – Happy me or happy others ?? I agree I am not that that kind who will always be happy to make others happy (and myself unhappy). I will be happy if I am happy. Without sacrifices without compromises. As simple as that.

Let us live our OWN life happily.

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I started loving myself and will going to be happy. JUST FOR ME.. YES CALL ME SELFISH.

 

One of my very good friend told me. She is so true saying this.

“Khud ke liye bahut baar bura banana padta he. And when this happens you learn better that it is just you and yourself who matters.”

 

So, Come on world call me bad, call me selfish, call me arrogant but this is me.. This is happy me and free me.

 

P.S. alright I am taking this risk of writing this. I challenged myself to be me and no more hiding. No hard feelings.

P.P.S – I do not care for what people think of me. What i think of myself is what matters. Breaking my “statue” in your hands.

Categories: Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

It’s YOUR OWN life !! Live Good.


In one of my earlier posts Addiction Redefined i mentioned about 90 / 10 Principle. Seriously, it slipped off my mind until a friend requested it and me too came across situations which remind me of this.  So here it goes..90/10 Principle by Stephen Covey

It will change your life
(or at least, the way you react to situations)

We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be arriving late, which throws our whole schedule off.
A driver may cut us off in the traffic.

You CAN control 90% of your life – by how you react to the 10% you can’t control. You yourself can influence your attitudes, behaviors, thoughts, and words.

 

We are into the habit of reacting almost immediately to what was happening around without any attempt to control our reactions in any way. Because of that, our reactions were negative and destructive.

 

 Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 Principle.

If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You do not have to let the negative comments affect you. React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, or getting stressed out.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in the traffic?
Do you lose your temper?
Pound on the steering wheel?
Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket?
Who cares if you arrive 10 seconds later at work?
Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 Principle and don’t worry about it.

You are told you lost your job.
Why lose sleep and get irritated?
It will not work out.
Use your worrying energy and time to find a new job.

The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day.
Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant?
She has no control over what is going on.
It will just make things worse.
Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger, why stress out?

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed, Gyan | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Supposed To Be A One Liner


Make your heart and mind learn to have no expectations. Train them for everything but expectation. Expectation hurts badly, very badly. Except expectation or accept hurts. Your life, your choice. Live wisely !!

Categories: Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

This is She


P1040135

She has secrets you’ll never know or understand.

She appears so strong on the outside,
but on the inside her world is spinning upside down.
She is smiling and standing tall to the outer world,
she is crying and breaking down in her inner world.

She appears so happy to her mates,
but alone, she shares her tears with her pillow.
She knows not to get her hopes up,
as they always come crashing down.
She has heard it all before & felt it all,
She has experienced more than her fair share.

One touch & she’ll flinch
One harsh word & she’ll cry
One bad moment, & she’ll break down

She trusts no one, because the people she has, hurt her & leave her to pick up the pieces
She believes no one, because the people she has, lie & betray her.
So for now she’ll keep to herself  & pretend everything is fine, when everything is wrong

I know this girl, because this girl…

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Only Aid


 

 

 

lockFalling, disappointment, sadness, feeling down, blahblabla….. all negatives are also the part of life.

My happiness is in my hands. No one but i am the maker of my mood, my day, my life. Why and how the hell anyone out there can hit me inside?? No one can. No one has that right.

 
RISE every time i fall, i IGNORE & KICK OUT disappointments, i CHEER UP in sadness, i SMILE every time i am down. i Say – “Yes !! i can change my mood, and i WILL.”  CRY??.. yes i cry hard but then i SMILE HARDER. yohooo… i am happy, i made myself happy and i promise to be back again from lows, in lesser efforts..

The key to my mood, my feelings is in my hands, i know better which way to unlock. 😉

Happiness

 

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

HOPE v/s FREEDOM


 

Free

 

ANOTHER CONTRARY TALK

 

Losing All Hope is Freedom.

Never Lose Hope.

 

Read somewhere – “Never lose hope”. Also read “losing all hope is freedom”. How contradictory !! This is the same controversial thing I have posted some time back. Another adds up to the list 😉

Namiwise –

  1. “Losing All Hope is Freedom”, then why is it said that – “Never Lose Hope” ??
  2. Why  “Never Lose Hope” if  “Losing All Hope is Freedom” ??

HOPE – very vague term. Can be used, twisted & turned person to person. So much subjective in nature. It is our state of mind that matters. Hope binds us (hope is bandhan). In general hope means desire. And desire gives rise to bondages. If I want to be free, there should not be any hope. If we want to be free from bondages, we have to obviously lose hope (bondages). When there is hope without any desire than it may be called “faith”. Faith should again be desireless. There should not be any craving no aversion. This is the bottom line. Whether I hope, not hope, desire, not desire, have faith or don’t have faith , in every situation my very state of mind should be equanimous. Then it will work.

Never lose hope is sort of craving and when it becomes intense you will never get what you are not losing hope for. And at that very stage, the last stage, your mind will get desire free and you lose all and feel free. AND ..AND…YES THEN..WHOOSSHH… here it appears what you no more hope for. THIS IS THE REAL LAW OF NATURE.

Never lose hope and keep doing efforts but never let it overtake your state of mind of calmness and at the end of the day when you lose all hope you will be FREE. FREE like you were born anew, free as you were on the first day.. with no hope, no desire, no faith ..nothing. just calm and equanimous.

“Never Lose Hope” will keep me going. Will keep me alive. that is necessary for living and “Losing All Hope” is actual and real freedom and is very necessary for DYING. Will help me die.

 

freedom

P.S.

That means hope binds us, hope is bandhan. If I want to be free then there should not be any hope but faith. Yes faith is better than hope. Hope is asakti bhara.. hope is desire.. but faith is vishwas, vishwas is always greater than desire.

Faith is desireless. If there is desire then it comes craving, when craving comes then the thought does not remain pure, but it gets spoiled by the ego, by desire.

Faith sets us free from desire, from hope. Hope is craving, faith is bhakti.

If I hope I cannot be free, if I want to be free I have to lose all hope.

Set myself free from hope. No hopes means no desire, no desire means no craving, means no tension means free.

Faith is trust, devotion. Hope is expectation, and expectation hurts..always.

Lose hope but gain faith.

Strong faith can beat all hopes.

Categories: Gyan, Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Simple & Straight


Put the past behind you and move on. Keep running.

Sometimes it will stop raining, sun will come up.

I couldn’t say when.

just keep running

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed, Gyan, One Liners | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Facebook Page


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A BIG thanks to ALL the readers, supporters and fans..

DO Recommend blog to your friends too.

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Categories: Raw Writings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Are You BUSY??


Its not enough to be BUSY…but BE EASY..

Easy at  work without tension.

Easy with others in approach.

Easy with oneself for inner peace.

Have a BE EASY LIFE.. 🙂

Categories: Copy Paste & Changed | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A Negative Poem


I need, I want, I have to,

A force holds me though.

It’s not a good sign,

Only a cause for a sigh.

I don’t want to degrade,

I can’t either direct. 

I know what I suppose to do,

But it  is not I am heading to.

What the hell happening to me,

This is not the real me.

Categories: English Poems, Poems | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Hey Life, What Next ??


Crossroad

Life is much like a dark wood

With as many crossroads, it could.

I choose one, left the other,

With all the courage I can gather,

I let go the past, accepted the present,

It was my choice, nothing to repent.

Oh yes, Life is like a tangled wood

With as many crossroads, it could.

Now in the woods, walked a mile or so,

I am on the same crossroad, I know..

..The one, from where I started..

Categories: English Poems, Poems | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

निर्णय


Translate in English

हम मनुष्यों की एक आदत होती है – किसी भी बात को अपने अनुरूप ढाल लेना और अपने मतलब का चुन लेना | और इसी आदत से सामने आती है कुछ रोचक व विवादास्पद बातें –  Continue reading

Categories: Raw Writings, Vipassana | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

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